The Bankruptcy Bonus-sode

Warning! This is not the Expertise podcast. This is an illegally recorded phone conversation about the Expertise podcast. By listening, you are a party to that illegality. And that's the best kind of party there is. Perfect. Done. Next, check. This is our business meeting, right? Boom, boom, check, check. Titty, titty, boom, boom. That's not the way they say that, Clare. Yeah, I'm just trying to talk like business guys. What are some other phrases that business guys like to use? Checkity, checkity, clack, clack. Okay. What does that indicate in business jargon?

Well, that's when you have a to-do list. Yeah. Checkity, checkity, clack, clack. Checkity, check, you know, when you've done it. Clack, clack, that means tell people that you've done it. Okay. Any other jargon that you think people could benefit from? Nope, that's it. Jimmy, jimmy, jog, jog. What's that one for? I know you know how important self-care is and exercise. Yes. So, it's a jimmy to remind you to jog. Oh, right. And by saying it twice, it's much easier to remember. Almost anything works that way. Like, if you're trying to eat right, eat, eat, right, right.

Oh, right. I thought you were going to say, Jimmy, Jimmy, eat it. Because the jimmy is like you're jimmying your brain. Yeah, you've got to jimmy that memory. Yeah. That's where jimmy comes from. It's derived from memory. Yeah, I love that. Jimmy, jimmy, potty break. Jimmy, jimmy, let's talk. I love office slang. I think it's really helpful in everyday life. Do you think that we would benefit from having more people in our office to have that sort of sparkling repartee with? I do think. I think that it would jimmy, jimmy, wake us up. Like, you know, water cooler chat.

Jimmy, jimmy, water cooler. Yes. The trouble is, Claire, we just don't have the physical space for more than you and me and barely enough for that. Yeah, that's right. And my hips. Jimmy, jimmy, build out. Jimmy, jimmy, build out. Chickity, chickity, clack, clack. Do you know a carpenter? I do know a carpenter, Jimmy. Perfect. What's his company called? Jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy? Yes. Does he drive a truck? He drives a jimmy. Hey, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy. Yeah, yeah. Well, that sounds obviously like the right guy to hire for the job. For our build out.

Now, Daniel, if we're serious about building out our offices. Oh, gosh, yeah. We need to get that onto the expenses and the budget. I know that. Honestly, Claire, I was going to ask you about something related to money. Could I just divert for a moment? Sure, sure. Jimmy, jimmy that talk. Jimmy, jimmy, sure, sure. Claire. Yeah. Could I borrow a dollar? Absolutely. For how long? Well, I would actually prefer to think of it as an investment rather than a loan. See, here's the thing. I feel like for motivation to keep us really excited about the booming business that we're creating, if we did that frame your first dollar bill that your company earned.

Right. And hang it on the wall. It would give motivation to you and to me, the other office workers that we share our jimmy, jimmy, talk, talk with. Yes. And even jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy when he comes through. Right. You know, they can look at that dollar bill in the frame on the wall and see that we are a going business. So, you're not asking me to lend you money. You're asking me to invest in our business with a dollar bill. Honestly, I'm not looking at the money as money. I'm looking at the money as decor. However, Dano, the decor is money. The point of it is that it's money.

That's what's exciting. Money gets juices flowing. Yeah. Money is the jimmy, jimmy of all jimmy, jimmies. The money represents money. I think that's what makes it art. I will invest a dollar bill in jimmying up the excitement of our workplace. Great. Great. And then if you could just write on it with a felt tip pen, first dollar earned. I know that's not completely honest, but I feel like that's what we need to gin up the jimmy. But I don't know that I could write a lie on top of Abe Lincoln's face. Are you worried about the repercussions of the federal government bringing to bear upon you the full force of its might?

Yes. Claire, you're Canadian. That's true. I think if anybody can pull off a misdemeanor like this, it's you as a Canadian. Okay, then, Dano, I'll do it. Okay. And there's one more thing. I need your dollar with the insignia. And could I actually borrow a dollar? I would need to buy a frame. Oh, so that's a different dollar. Yeah. So there would be two dollars involved, and I would never get them mixed up because there would be the one that you've written on. I'm getting the sense that you feel an attachment to this dollar and are being polite but not really excited about the idea of handing it over for us to frame and mount on the wall.

What if we crowdsourced our first dollar? That's the way to do it. That's the way to do it. Yeah? Yeah. I think just for a dollar and crowdsourcing that, people are always asking for $50,000 for this or $100,000 for that. If we just want one dollar, you know, we could break that down into hay pennies and have our hundreds of listeners each pitch in, and everybody feels like they've contributed to that meaningful installation. I'm starting to want a framed 200 hay pennies on the wall. Our first 200 hay pennies. Yeah. Christmas time is coming, and the hen is getting fed.

Right? And some pennies made of hay. That's an interesting installment. That may be a fire hazard. We'd have to check with Jimmy Jimmy on that. Right. Okay. Yeah. What's that service called where you sign up and get people to give you money? Fund my... Fund my dollar? Yeah. All right. So here's the only thing, Claire. I did do a little search into Patreon, it's called. Oh, that's definitely one. And they charge a dollar to use the service. Okay. But we still need our initial dollar. Yeah. That's the thing with just doing the finances. I wish we could bring someone in to handle that for us.

I feel like you and I are good at coming up with the big ideas, the dreams that really make this thing fly. Yeah. But we need somebody in the back office. Yeah. Taking care of the hay pennies and the threepence. We need a real money-minded fella, an old school accountant type. Maybe we should put out an ad. Nothing wrong with that. Old school accountant type needed. Please apply. Must provide own funding. Must provide own paycheck. Yes. This is the cycle. I don't see how we get out of it, Claire. Oh, yeah. Because obviously, an accountant is going to want to get paid.

And who knows about payment better than an accountant? You know what we actually need? We need Rumpelstiltskin to be our accountant. All right. So we've already got the hay from the pennies. Yes. We've got hay from the pennies. If we can get a spinning wheel, then we might finally be able to make this thing work. End result being, we get the framed money on the wall. Jimmy Jimmy comes through. Jimmy Jimmy comes through. We get to carry on with the construction project. And things are suddenly looking up. Oh, my gosh. I really feel good. I feel good about this, for this.

I feel like I want to say, go fund me, go fund me, go fund me. Three times. Three times. And stamp your little foot. It's going to happen. Claire, dear Claire, you're dying. You're dying. Your light is growing faint. Her voice is so low, I can scarcely hear what you're saying. What? You think that you could get well again if listeners believed? Do you believe? Oh, please, please believe. If you believe, wherever you are, clap your hands and she'll hear you. She's getting better. She's getting stronger. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Excuse, I'm sorry. Never give in to the sorrows of life.

Always smile as much as possible. And Jimmy Jimmy happy.